Author Topic: bitches and Christmas  (Read 6784 times)

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Offline Be4u

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bitches and Christmas
« Reply #15 on: December 24 2005, 08:22:26 AM »
Quote from: "87natty @ Sat Dec 24, 2005 12:07 am"
$8 at Bath and Boy Works buys the happy man massage toy. Case closed.
pffft, then Phil will dump her.
Save the bumper fillers!
Move to Canadia!

Offline ledzeppac

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bitches and Christmas
« Reply #16 on: December 24 2005, 01:11:33 PM »
hahaha true......

Offline Recklessrob

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Re: bitches and Christmas
« Reply #17 on: December 25 2005, 12:48:13 AM »
Quote from: "Racer X @ Thu Dec 22, 2005 11:02 pm"
Let me give you young uns a little help here. Not sure how much to spend? Not sure how she will receive the gift? This is easy!

Look at her shoes. The pointier the toe, the higher the maintenance. Example, look at some 'high class' broad and then look down, probably very pointy shoes. Big, fat, low maintenance lesbians - Birkenstocks! GET IT!?!?

Also, the higher the hem line on her skirt, the higher the maintenance. Now if she has a high hem line and shoes that could cut a diamond, she costs too much for anyone driving a 20 year old Buick. Walk away.

I know what you are saying, but she only has a couple of pairs of pointy shoes, etc.... Look through the closet and figure out the amount of pointy shoes vs non pointy and that will give the degree of maintenance.

Ok all that being said, don't waste your time or money on Victoria secret, no one really wears that shit anyway. Natty's correct, gift certificates for the first time out tell her you're a cheap bastard that has no imagination. If she has no pointy shoes, BY ALL MEANS DO NOT BUY HER SOME NOW! No need to start her off on the wrong, ahem, foot.

So get her what she really needs. A shaking, vibrating applianance so she can finish the job you failed to do when you leave. This will show her that YOU know what YOUR inadequacies are and that you are willing to please her in spite of them.
Rob

Offline ledzeppac

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bitches and Christmas
« Reply #18 on: December 26 2005, 05:44:58 AM »
Dude my shit was a success!  She loved it....  
But I did get the "you can't be serious once can you?"  after she opened the box of granny panties...

Offline Be4u

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bitches and Christmas
« Reply #19 on: December 26 2005, 09:20:48 AM »
Quote from: "ledzeppac @ Mon Dec 26, 2005 4:44 am"
I did get the "you can't be serious once can you?"  after she opened the box of granny panties...
Oh SNAP!!! I wish I was there...LoL's!

And RR, to answer your question, NO! They moniter elementry bus stops very clostly.
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Move to Canadia!

Offline 87natty

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bitches and Christmas
« Reply #20 on: December 26 2005, 01:04:14 PM »
Can you see him getting his ass beat by the crossing guard? Being beaten with the stop sign?
My 1958 Mamiya can beat up whatever camera you just wasted your money on.

Offline Racer X

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Re: bitches and Christmas
« Reply #21 on: December 26 2005, 01:46:27 PM »
Quote from: "Recklessrob @ Sat Dec 24, 2005 9:48 pm"

If he does all that, is it still considdered OK for him to pick her
up at her school bus stop ?
Yes, but ONLY after getting her a big stick off the ice cream truck.

Next question....
2008 Charger SRT-8
2009 Challenger R/T
any questions?

Offline 87natty

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bitches and Christmas
« Reply #22 on: December 26 2005, 02:19:05 PM »
How much is a big stick these days? I remember they were a quarter when I was a kid. That is the true measure of inflation, when you talk like a geezer. "I remember a Snickers was a nickel..."
My 1958 Mamiya can beat up whatever camera you just wasted your money on.

Offline Recklessrob

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bitches and Christmas
« Reply #23 on: December 27 2005, 01:19:04 AM »
Quote from: "ledzeppac @ Mon Dec 26, 2005 5:44 am"
Dude my shit was a success!
Rob

 

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