Author Topic: Retards 101.  (Read 7181 times)

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Offline Recklessrob

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Retards 101.
« on: November 10 2006, 01:34:53 AM »
They're out there. :rolleyes;

Quote
The Ducks, Lab and Navigator

       HAVE YOU HEARD ABOUT THE TWO DUCK HUNTERS FROM WISCONSIN? ABSOLUTELY A TRUE  STORY HEARD ON A WISCONSIN RADIO STATION REPORTING ON THE INCIDENT.

       A guy buys a new Lincoln Navigator for $42,500.00 (with monthly payments of $560.00).

       He and a friend go duck hunting in upper Wisconsin. It's mid-winter; and of course all of the lakes are frozen. These two guys go out on the ice with their GUNS, a DOG, and of course the new NAVIGATOR. They decide they want to make a natural looking open water area for the ducks to focus on, something for the decoys to float on. Now making a hole in the ice large enough to invite a passing duck, is going to take a little more power than the average drill auger can produce.

      So, out of the back of the new Navigator comes a stick of dynamite with a short 40 second-fuse. Now our two Rocket Scientists, afraid they might slip on the ice while trying to run away after lighting the fuse (and becoming toast, along with the Navigator), decide on the following course of action:

       They light the 40 second fuse; then, with a mighty thrust, they throw the stick of dynamite as far away as possible.

       Remember a couple of paragraphs back when I mentioned the NAVIGATOR, the GUNS, and the DOG...???

       Let's talk about the dog: A highly trained Black Lab used for RETRIEVING; especially things thrown by the owner. You guessed it: the dog takes off across the ice at a high rate of speed and grabs the stick of dynamite, with the burning 40-second fuse, just as it hits the ice.

       The two men swallow, blink, start waving their arms and, with veins in their necks swelling to resemble stalks of rhubarb, scream and holler at the dog to stop. The dog, now apparently cheered on by his master, keeps coming.

       One hunter panics, grabs the shotgun and shoots the dog. The shotgun is  loaded with #8 bird shot, hardly big enough to stop a Black Lab. The dog stops for a moment, slightly confused, then continues on. Another shot, and this time the dog, still standing, becomes really confused and of course terrified, thinks these two geniuses have gone insane. The dog takes off to find cover, UNDER the brand new Navigator.
       The men continue to scream as they run. The red hot exhaust pipe on the truck touches the dog's rear end, he yelps, drops the dynamite under the truck and takes off after his master.

      Then " "" "" "" "" " BOOOOOOOOOOOOM "" "" "" "" "" ! ! ! !

       The truck is blown to bits and sinks to the bottom of the lake, leaving the two idiots standing there with "I can't believe this just happened" looks on their faces.

       The insurance company says that sinking a vehicle in a lake by illegal use of explosives is NOT COVERED by the policy. And he still had yet to
       make the first of those $560.00 a month payments.

      The dog is okay. .doing fine.
Rob

Offline Be4u

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Retards 101.
« Reply #1 on: November 10 2006, 01:40:42 AM »
wholey crap! I feel for that guy. funny story!!!
Save the bumper fillers!
Move to Canadia!

Offline TSM Girl

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Re: Retards 101.
« Reply #2 on: November 10 2006, 06:09:48 AM »
lol.....pretty sad that there are people that stupid out there....lol
Donna

"Stupid people should NOT breed!"

Offline Top Speed

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Retards 101.
« Reply #3 on: November 10 2006, 08:28:25 AM »
Classic!!  lol
Champion Irons w/T&D roller rockers, TA-61 turbo, 206/206 Comp Cam,  57 lb/hr Siemens Injectors, 3000 stall PTC, PTE Plenum w/RJC Power Plate, 70 mm Accufab Throttle Body, RJC 325 Megacooler, TurboTweak 5.7/ Alky Control w/M1 methanol, 23 psig on the street, Puddn' Power engine, Borla Exhaust

Chris

Offline Turbogn86

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Retards 101.
« Reply #4 on: November 10 2006, 08:35:57 AM »
LMFAO!!!!!
86 GN-sold
87 WE4 (Daily Driver)

Offline 87natty

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Retards 101.
« Reply #5 on: November 10 2006, 07:14:20 PM »
OMG, is this really true?
My 1958 Mamiya can beat up whatever camera you just wasted your money on.

Offline TSM Girl

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Retards 101.
« Reply #6 on: November 10 2006, 08:26:49 PM »
Quote from: "87natty @ Fri Nov 10, 2006 6:14 pm"
OMG, is this really true?



It would not surprise me if it was.
Donna

"Stupid people should NOT breed!"

Offline Be4u

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Retards 101.
« Reply #7 on: November 10 2006, 08:27:49 PM »
sounds believable.
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Move to Canadia!

Offline Recklessrob

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Retards 101.
« Reply #8 on: November 11 2006, 12:52:22 AM »
Quote from: "Be4u @ Fri Nov 10, 2006 8:27 pm"
sounds believable.

The Wisconsin boy has spoken. :prayer: I believe !  :rofl;
Rob

Offline Be4u

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Retards 101.
« Reply #9 on: November 11 2006, 02:26:28 AM »
Oh yeah, I lived up there. Sounds believable.the y do some crazy shit up there. Theres always a winter story that makes you say WTF!?!?!
Save the bumper fillers!
Move to Canadia!

Offline TSM Girl

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Retards 101.
« Reply #10 on: November 11 2006, 08:30:13 AM »
Quote from: "Be4u @ Sat Nov 11, 2006 1:26 am"
Oh yeah, I lived up there. Sounds believable.the y do some crazy shit up there. Theres always a winter story that makes you say WTF!?!?!


What part of Cheeseland did you live in?
Donna

"Stupid people should NOT breed!"

Offline Be4u

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Retards 101.
« Reply #11 on: November 11 2006, 01:13:32 PM »
Racine. by the Grove.
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Move to Canadia!

Offline TSM Girl

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Re: Retards 101.
« Reply #12 on: November 11 2006, 02:48:08 PM »
Holy Crap Batman! You were only about 40 miles from me..  I raced at the Grove a lot.  We almost bought a house in Racine when we were getting married but Bryan changed his mind on the house. Small world.  You and Sylvan scare me.  Its bad enough that Sylvan used to go to the same bars as I and now this......lol. ...very small world, very cool.  :supz:
Donna

"Stupid people should NOT breed!"

Offline ledzeppac

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Retards 101.
« Reply #13 on: November 11 2006, 05:05:42 PM »
ok that this story sounds like something we ALL would do...

Offline 87natty

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Retards 101.
« Reply #14 on: November 11 2006, 05:57:13 PM »
That's sad, because it's true. LOL
My 1958 Mamiya can beat up whatever camera you just wasted your money on.

 

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