After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.
...and you will have to pee.
Lorenz's Law of Mechanical Repair
Any tool, when dropped, will roll into the least accessible corner.
Anthony's Law of the Workshop
If it jams, force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway.
Lowery's Law
The solution to a problem changes the problem.
Peer's Law
There is no mechanical problem so difficult that it cannot be solved by brute strength and ignorance.
William's Law
The most ineffective workers will be systematically moved to the place where they can do the least damage - management.
The Dilbert Principle
It is a mistake to allow any mechanical object to realize that you are in a hurry.
Ralph's Observation
Never accept a drink from a urologist, nor a friendly handshake from a proctologist.
The Law of Common Sense
Never get into fights with ugly people, they have nothing to lose.
The Law of Reality
Everyone has a right to be stupid. Some just abuse the privilege.
Legal Rights
Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
Law of Probable Dispersal