IHADAV8.com - Turbo Buick Tech, and Nonsense
General => IHADAV8 Playground => Topic started by: sun dog on January 11 2006, 02:19:15 AM
-
I waste alot of time thinking up funny new drink and porn movie names.
I just ran out of tonic while mixing, so I had a 3/1 gin to tonic ratio in there.
Hence the new name "SuperTonic Boom".
As, for porn names "little oral annie" is still one of my favorites, I wish I could claim it as my own.
I'm sure someone will have some good ones. :snakeman:
-
The Sexorcist. Oh yes.
As far as a drink name goes, I love Crazy Horse. I feel liek I'm commiting a crime buying it.
-
Little Whorehouse on the Prairie cracks me up.
As for drinks I'd have to say the good ole: Suffering Bastard.
-
Hey Sylvan, what's the name of the shot with the Tabasco in it?
-
Buttery Nipple
-
Hey Sylvan, what's the name of the shot with the Tabasco in it?
Ah, bastard- you beat me to the punch. A healthy shot consisting of half bourbon/half tabasco is called a Buffalo Sweat.
....as for the porn name, a friend once told me there was a big girl movie called Fatliners.
-
....as for the porn name, a friend once told me there was a big girl movie called Fatliners.
MMMM Hmmmm....yeah, ok. A friend you say? lol :rofl;
-
....as for the porn name, a friend once told me there was a big girl movie called Fatliners.
MMMM Hmmmm....yeah, ok. A friend you say? lol
-
Ah... I had a few spots like that. I was a nomad.
-
A few more porno names I remember seeing:
Rambutt, First Blood
Saving Ryan's Privates
-
"I'm not talking a cup of cheap gin splashed over an ice cube. I'm talking satin, fire and ice; Fred Astaire in a glass; surgical cleanliness; insight and comfort; redemption and absolution. I' m talking a Martini."--Anonymous
If you aspire to being a master Martini mixologist here are a few basics to start you on the road toward making a good martini:
Begin with the finest ingredients you can afford. Mixers like soda, tonic, or juice can hide a multitude of sins in a highball like a gin and tonic since they comprise the majority of a drink. But a Martini depends on the liquor for its flavor. If it's no good, neither is the drink.
Use glass or stainless steel implements. Aluminum shakers degrade quickly when they come in contact with acids (like lemon oil or juice). When this happens, the metal imparts its unique essence into the mix: a liquid version of nibbling the wrapper off a Hershey's Kiss. Likewise, copper and, some say, silver have the same effect. (Although the latter might just be the tarnish cleaning off into your drink.).
Make sure the ice is fresh. Don't scrape the remnants of last month's chili-fest off the cubes, throw them away and make fresh ones. If the ice trays are old, replace them, too (and put a box of baking soda in the freezer). True perfectionists use mineral water instead of tap water and add a touch of bitters or a squeeze of lemon to it.
Pre-made Martinis are not a good substitute for the real thing. In the immortal words of author Bernard DeVoto, "You can no more keep a Martini in the refrigerator than you can keep a kiss there. The proper union of gin and vermouth is . . . one of the happiest marriages on earth, and one of the shortest lived." Believe it or not there are even a couple of pre-mixed Martinis available (some have been around for decades). But they're about as exciting as champagne in a can. A big part of the Martini experience is the presentation: A perfectly clean, chilled Martini glass, a frosty shaker, the sound of the ice shifting inside it as the drink is poured slowly. This is what the cocktail is all about.
One of the biggest debates between mixologists is whether to shake or stir a Martini. It's been said that shaking bruises the drink, it doesn't. However, that doesn't mean there's no truth to the rumor about bruising drinks. You can bruise a Bloody Mary. The tomato juice breaks down and looses its thick texture, becoming watery (tomato juice, like ketchup, is what's known in scientific terms as a plastic colloid, an emulsion which becomes more liquid with agitation). This is why a good bloody is muddled-poured from mixing glass to mixing glass-to blend it. None of the ingredients in a Martini are susceptible to bruising, but there are more subtle differences. Stirring makes a clearer and stronger martini, but takes longer and doesn't blend it as thoroughly (let's face it, it's also more fun to shake them). Shaking, on the other hand, chills the drink faster, but imparts a little more air plus tiny chips of ice which tend to cloud the martini. The added air also affects the aldehydes, making the flavor stronger. For vodka martini drinkers this is perfect, however gin can become overpowering if it's shaken.
The myth of the dryness
Dryness refers to the ratio of liquor (which is dry) to vermouth which is sweet). The less vermouth the drier the Martini. Decades ago a Dry Martini was made with two or three parts gin to one part vermouth, but over the years the ratio changed to 6:1, 8:1, 10:1, 15:1 and so on, as people sought to outdo each other (rumor has it that Winston Churchill would simply bow toward France, where vermouth was made, after he poured his gin). But this has more to do with humor than flavor. A 4:1 Martini can be outstanding if you use the right vermouth. Or better yet, try top shelf aperitif wine (vermouth, in case you never read the fine print on the label, is an aperitif wine) like Lillet or Punt e Mes in place of the vermouth.
The exact ratios of gin or vodka to vermouth or aperitif wine are as subject to personal taste as the selection of a signature after shave or cologne. A popular lounge story relates that the Canadian Mounties carry a small survival kit with them whenever they venture into the wilderness. Inside, there are miniature bottles of gin and vermouth. The kit also contains a small metal cup, a swizzle stick, and a card that instructs the Mountie: should he/she become hopelessly lost in the wilderness, they should sit down, take out the survival kit, and begin making a Martini. Before the drink is mixed it's guaranteed someone will appear to rescue them, saying, "No, no, that's not the way to make a Martini!"
The driest Martinis don't necessarily contain any vermouth at all. Both the Cognac Martini (a 5:1 blend of vodka to cognac, garnished with a twist) and the Berlin Station Chief (a 5:1 mix of gin to single malt scotch, garnished with olives or a twist) both have a wonderfully dry and slightly smoky edge.
However dryness is neither an imperative nor is it traditional. The Sweet Martini (a 4:1 gin and sweet vermouth or Lillet Rouge concoction, garnished with an orange twist), has been around since the early 1900s, and it's delicious. Most of the hot new recipes are also on the sweet side: from the Cosmopolitan (containing 6 parts vodka, 1 part cranberry juice, a splash of Rose's Lime Juice, a splash of Cointreau, garnished with a twist), to the 911 (a silky 4:1 vodka and Godiva Chocolate liqueur blend, garnished with a touch of raspberry pur
-
After all that, I'll buy you one, but you're gonna order it.
-
Heres a good set of porno names.
LET'S PLAY STAIN THE COUCH
PRIME CUTS - YO QUIERO TACO SMELL
ULTRA KINKY #79 - BOWLIN' IN HER COLON
TEA BAGGER VANCE
MAY THE FORESKIN BE WITH YOU
and finally
WILLIE WANKER AND THE FUDGE PACKING FACTORY
-
Wait forgot to add Edward Penishands, thats a damn good one.
-
We go from a fine post about Martinies to gay porn. I believe Lepizzle will have a new friend shortly.
-
:prayer: Racer X
-
After all that, I'll buy you one, but you're gonna order it.
No problem my man, in fact I'll order two! :supz: :rolleyes:
-
Not too long ago I had a little get together (Old guy speak for party) at my house and the following drink was very popular with the soccer moms:
2 parts Vodka
1 part Frangelico
splash of Soda Water
Shake vigorously over a ton of ice and serve in a chilled cocktail glass.
Oh the name of the drink?
Hard Dick, and I wonder why the Soccer Moms loved it?
-
Not too long ago I had a little get together (Old guy speak for party) at my house and the following drink was very popular with the soccer moms:
2 parts Vodka
1 part Frangelico
splash of Soda Water
Shake vigorously over a ton of ice and serve in a chilled cocktail glass.
Oh the name of the drink?
Hard Dick, and I wonder why the Soccer Moms loved it?
Lemme guess, they weren't "soccer moms" until 9 months after
the party. :rofl;