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General => IHADAV8 Playground => Topic started by: ledzeppac on December 22 2005, 04:52:45 PM

Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: ledzeppac on December 22 2005, 04:52:45 PM
I've been dating this girl for 6 weeks now sooo great perfect timing... how much do I need to spend on her for Christmas??  My school friends say $200....  I should just get her a Victoria's secret gift certificate and we should go together and pick something out....  but seriously how much money is she gonna cost me?
Title: Re: bitches and Christmas
Post by: Be4u on December 22 2005, 05:32:57 PM
Dude, six weeks? K.I.S.S.

By now word has gotten back to her...your stuck paying 200. Buy a bunck of small, cool gifts. training bras, cd's, barby dolls...no make-up, shes still too young. When she turns 14...then buy make-up.
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: 87natty on December 22 2005, 08:15:28 PM
No gift certificate, makes you look like you can't make up your mind or don't know her. Next time her clothes are off, get her sizes and buy a few things. Surprise her with something awesome, but something she can wear on a normal day too. Get some wine too.
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: ledzeppac on December 22 2005, 08:51:22 PM
well she alredy told me to jsut get her a gift certificate to express....

And she did hint for some crappy perfume BS....  

I'll figure something out.
Title: Re: bitches and Christmas
Post by: Racer X on December 22 2005, 11:02:13 PM
Let me give you young uns a little help here. Not sure how much to spend? Not sure how she will receive the gift? This is easy!

Look at her shoes. The pointier the toe, the higher the maintenance. Example, look at some 'high class' broad and then look down, probably very pointy shoes. Big, fat, low maintenance lesbians - Birkenstocks! GET IT!?!?

Also, the higher the hem line on her skirt, the higher the maintenance. Now if she has a high hem line and shoes that could cut a diamond, she costs too much for anyone driving a 20 year old Buick. Walk away.

I know what you are saying, but she only has a couple of pairs of pointy shoes, etc.... Look through the closet and figure out the amount of pointy shoes vs non pointy and that will give the degree of maintenance.

Ok all that being said, don't waste your time or money on Victoria secret, no one really wears that shit anyway. Natty's correct, gift certificates for the first time out tell her you're a cheap bastard that has no imagination. If she has no pointy shoes, BY ALL MEANS DO NOT BUY HER SOME NOW! No need to start her off on the wrong, ahem, foot.

So get her what she really needs. A shaking, vibrating applianance so she can finish the job you failed to do when you leave. This will show her that YOU know what YOUR inadequacies are and that you are willing to please her in spite of them.  :supz:

Good Luck Phil.  :D
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: 87natty on December 22 2005, 11:13:42 PM
Wow! I'm clapping my hands.
Title: Re: bitches and Christmas
Post by: Be4u on December 23 2005, 05:05:30 AM
No doubt, that was pretty fuckin' good.
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: 87natty on December 23 2005, 05:08:16 AM
It just came to me! Buying her a gift certificate would be like her buying you a "Power by Ford" hat!
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: ledzeppac on December 23 2005, 05:25:37 AM
ok ok she's stayed with me for this long and I've spent a total of.... 25 bucks on her...

Brian check my Myspace, she is on it, I'm sure you can figure which one she is by looking at the comments...  

I'm just gonna give her a kick in the ass
Title: Re: bitches and Christmas
Post by: Be4u on December 23 2005, 01:25:09 PM
Your myspace blinds me.
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: 87natty on December 23 2005, 01:30:10 PM
Quote from: "ledzeppac @ Fri Dec 23, 2005 2:25 am"

Brian check my Myspace, she is on it, I'm sure you can figure which one she is by looking at the comments...
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: ledzeppac on December 23 2005, 05:29:42 PM
Kim...
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: 87natty on December 23 2005, 06:14:21 PM
I figured that, just making sure. Good job Phil, gimp leg and all. PM me your phone number again.
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: ledzeppac on December 23 2005, 10:54:43 PM
Number Pm'd....

You guys will pissed but I went the easy and lazy way....

$50 bucks Express
$75 Vicotria's she'll take me to choose the outfits.
Perfume $80
some bath and body works shit $15

Yah more than I wanted to spend but she hasnt cost me anything in a couple months so whatever.  I'll get laid.....
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: 87natty on December 24 2005, 01:07:33 AM
$8 at Bath and Boy Works buys the happy man massage toy. Case closed.
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: Be4u on December 24 2005, 08:22:26 AM
Quote from: "87natty @ Sat Dec 24, 2005 12:07 am"
$8 at Bath and Boy Works buys the happy man massage toy. Case closed.
pffft, then Phil will dump her.
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: ledzeppac on December 24 2005, 01:11:33 PM
hahaha true......
Title: Re: bitches and Christmas
Post by: Recklessrob on December 25 2005, 12:48:13 AM
Quote from: "Racer X @ Thu Dec 22, 2005 11:02 pm"
Let me give you young uns a little help here. Not sure how much to spend? Not sure how she will receive the gift? This is easy!

Look at her shoes. The pointier the toe, the higher the maintenance. Example, look at some 'high class' broad and then look down, probably very pointy shoes. Big, fat, low maintenance lesbians - Birkenstocks! GET IT!?!?

Also, the higher the hem line on her skirt, the higher the maintenance. Now if she has a high hem line and shoes that could cut a diamond, she costs too much for anyone driving a 20 year old Buick. Walk away.

I know what you are saying, but she only has a couple of pairs of pointy shoes, etc.... Look through the closet and figure out the amount of pointy shoes vs non pointy and that will give the degree of maintenance.

Ok all that being said, don't waste your time or money on Victoria secret, no one really wears that shit anyway. Natty's correct, gift certificates for the first time out tell her you're a cheap bastard that has no imagination. If she has no pointy shoes, BY ALL MEANS DO NOT BUY HER SOME NOW! No need to start her off on the wrong, ahem, foot.

So get her what she really needs. A shaking, vibrating applianance so she can finish the job you failed to do when you leave. This will show her that YOU know what YOUR inadequacies are and that you are willing to please her in spite of them.
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: ledzeppac on December 26 2005, 05:44:58 AM
Dude my shit was a success!  She loved it....  
But I did get the "you can't be serious once can you?"  after she opened the box of granny panties...
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: Be4u on December 26 2005, 09:20:48 AM
Quote from: "ledzeppac @ Mon Dec 26, 2005 4:44 am"
I did get the "you can't be serious once can you?"  after she opened the box of granny panties...
Oh SNAP!!! I wish I was there...LoL's!

And RR, to answer your question, NO! They moniter elementry bus stops very clostly.
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: 87natty on December 26 2005, 01:04:14 PM
Can you see him getting his ass beat by the crossing guard? Being beaten with the stop sign?
Title: Re: bitches and Christmas
Post by: Racer X on December 26 2005, 01:46:27 PM
Quote from: "Recklessrob @ Sat Dec 24, 2005 9:48 pm"

If he does all that, is it still considdered OK for him to pick her
up at her school bus stop ?
Yes, but ONLY after getting her a big stick off the ice cream truck.

Next question....
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: 87natty on December 26 2005, 02:19:05 PM
How much is a big stick these days? I remember they were a quarter when I was a kid. That is the true measure of inflation, when you talk like a geezer. "I remember a Snickers was a nickel..."
Title: bitches and Christmas
Post by: Recklessrob on December 27 2005, 01:19:04 AM
Quote from: "ledzeppac @ Mon Dec 26, 2005 5:44 am"
Dude my shit was a success!
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