Author Topic: Anyone looking for a Nissan Skyline? (Craigslist Lulz)  (Read 4432 times)

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Offline SuperSix

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Anyone looking for a Nissan Skyline? (Craigslist Lulz)
« on: October 19 2011, 11:17:22 AM »
Who knew Canooks could be so hilarious?

http://vancouver.en.craigslist.ca/pml/cto/2619410616.html

Copy/paste in case it gets flagged:


Skyline! 1990 GTSt - $5000 (Maple Ridge)


Date: 2011-10-17, 12:39PM PDT
Reply to: sale-bqyhj-2619410616@craigslist.org [Errors when replying to ads?]

This isn't your normal skyline. This motherfcker is the skyline God would drive if he wasn't busy doing God sh*t like making tsunamis and crap. Its set up to go fast, and go fast sideways. Who doesn't like to get sideway?! Terrorists, thats who. Are you a terrorist? No? Then you need this car.

Handling? This car handles like a junior executive CEO. Go around corners like the devil himself is chasing you, and not give a fck.

Whats that? You like drifting? Well I've got some great god d@mn news for you. This car was a drift project of mine, and the last owner was planning on making it a drift machine too. Interior is for pussies so we got rid of it. Manly as fck. It literally oozes testosterone. So much so that its puddling up in the back.

Seats? this cocks*cker has got two. One for you, and one for the hot @ss broad thats gunna be all upons your dick after you buy this car. You're a girl? Sh*t works both ways. One seat for you, and one seat for that hot @ss dude you've been trying to hook up with for weeks. Deal with it,sh*ts getting serious.

Stereos and AC are for hippies. Fortunately this car has neither. Oh look at me, I like listen to Simon and Garfunkel and think about puppies. F*ck that. The only noises you're gunna be hearing is the ultra manly engine noises coming from this sweet turbocharged, intercooled, 24 valve inline 6. Sh*ts getting real, real f*cking fast.

This car has got a bright orange ebrake handle (b*tches love orange) with a drift button for those super ultra megahellatasti c bar room brawler ebrake lockers. F*ck. Yes.

Now, I'll be honest. The wheels are a little lackluster, although everyones gunna be so focused on your super gangster drifting that nobody is going to give a f*ck about your sh*tty stock 16s. Don't worry, I've got you fcking covered. Its like we're in Vietnam and you just got ambushed by Charlie. Don't worry, friend, I've got your fcking back and I blow charlie to kingdom fcking come. For an extra $450 I can throw in some added p*ssy magnets for wheels, just don't come crawling back to me complaining that you're getting TOO much vajayjay. Bright fcking green 18s. Greens not your thing? Super legit silver 18s. Done like dinner.

This car has got 1.5 metric f*ck tons of awesome parts. Bride, Greddy, Brembo, the list doesn't f*cking END. It just keeps going and going, like the energizer bunny on speed.

You like going fast? Ever tried to outrun 24 police cars and 3 helicopters? You need this car. It will go so fcking fast that you may very well go back in time. It happened to me once. Just once, but it was fcking rad. Its like someone took a rocket and opened its mouth and poured steroids down its throat and and threatened to kill its family if it wasn't the fastest motherfcker you've ever driven.

I get it. You're busy, I'm busy, lets not waste time. If you're interested send me a message and I'll get back to you ASAP. You send me a message, I send you one right back. Thats how this works.

'87 GN, 60lb, TA49, THDP, FTP cam, T+ lots o' shit - SOLD
'07 Ford F150 Lariat 2WD, 5.4L 3v - 255k
'20 Kubota BX2380. FEL, 60" deck
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Offline Charlief1

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Re: Anyone looking for a Nissan Skyline? (Craigslist Lulz)
« Reply #1 on: October 19 2011, 12:15:13 PM »
I didn't realize he was in kanada. Maybe he's an American that went up for the beer and can't get back now.

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Offline Steve Wood

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Re: Anyone looking for a Nissan Skyline? (Craigslist Lulz)
« Reply #2 on: October 19 2011, 02:07:24 PM »
so much for Canada having a better educational system than we do
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Offline gordyzx9r

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Re: Anyone looking for a Nissan Skyline? (Craigslist Lulz)
« Reply #3 on: October 19 2011, 07:30:55 PM »
He's actually pretty smart...it's getting allot more exposure than it would had he just run a normal ad. 

Offline KGB

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Re: Anyone looking for a Nissan Skyline? (Craigslist Lulz)
« Reply #4 on: October 20 2011, 09:23:59 AM »
If I was a retard (and I'm not claiming I am or not), ... I wouldn't go advertising it on CL.

I'd go on eBay where it can get global coverage. 

Offline richie6

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Re: Anyone looking for a Nissan Skyline? (Craigslist Lulz)
« Reply #5 on: October 21 2011, 12:23:59 AM »
For $5,000 it'll sell no sweat. But who the fuck wants a rhd car?
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Offline Steve Wood

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Re: Anyone looking for a Nissan Skyline? (Craigslist Lulz)
« Reply #6 on: October 21 2011, 08:40:08 PM »
For $5,000 it'll sell no sweat. But who the fuck wants a rhd car?

the Post Office?

Or someone that does not mind converting it
Steve Wood

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Offline richie6

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Re: Anyone looking for a Nissan Skyline? (Craigslist Lulz)
« Reply #7 on: October 21 2011, 10:50:11 PM »
Good one, Steve. It is a long reach to get to those rural mail boxes. :)
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Offline Steve Wood

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Re: Anyone looking for a Nissan Skyline? (Craigslist Lulz)
« Reply #8 on: October 21 2011, 11:37:25 PM »
I have been tempted to buy a postal jeep for the ranch....I learned to drive on the left years ago...so it should work fine with no traffic other than goats to avoid.
Steve Wood

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A lot of broken parts does not make you a racer; it makes you a slow learner.

Offline gordyzx9r

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Re: Anyone looking for a Nissan Skyline? (Craigslist Lulz)
« Reply #9 on: October 23 2011, 06:12:05 PM »
If I was a retard (and I'm not claiming I am or not), ... I wouldn't go advertising it on CL.

I'd go on eBay where it can get global coverage. 

I like the ones on ebay with a pic of woman by the car that talk about how much mileage it has, how rough the exterior is, how much of a pounding it's taken, etc...then go, "oh yeah and the car is for sale too".

 

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